The Populist Press Weblog

Orlando's Underground Media

Of Ballots and B.S. Eternal

leave a comment »

by Jack O’Spades

The cable and print news outlets tell me this is an exciting time for politics. While I can’t disagree with that generalization, I certainly don’t buy the implicit message of hope. Yeah, yeah, curious George and Dick “the Dick” Cheney® are about to get the boot, but I’m not spellbound by Obama-mania or Clinton fever. I want someone who will take on the madness of the last four administrations, (not just the last one!) and not someone who will, at best, ‘hold the line’.


Unlike the famous “Colbert Bump”, it seems that an endorsement from this paper may be a political death sentence, sorry Mr. Edwards! We’ll be voting for Obama (note – NOT AN ENDORSEMENT), since he’s still much better than ANY Republican president. That’s right preachers of the Ron Paul, we don’t like your candidate. No amount of angry letters will change the fact that he is xenophobic, libertarian nut job, who probably hates both brown AND black people.


So we’re certainly more cynical and stimulated than normal, hopefully that means that the parts I wrote will be at least interesting drivel. In addition, we have an editorial from one Mr. E. Smith-Jones. A quality piece on president Bush’s grand scheme to save the economy by giving us each about $600. As you can see Mr. Bush’s plan is incredibly complicated, so make sure you’re awake when reading it. If you can’t detect the sarcasm please put down the paper, it’s not for you. Also, consider making toast while you take a bath. Remember, electricity and water are nature’s best friends.


For those of you I haven’t offended away, or who are not taking a bath with a toaster, you may notice a theme in this volume of the press. As the election gets closer, the incidents of voting related shenanigans are on the rise, so we feel compelled to inform you on possible mischief at the polls. This observer would point out that more worrisome than the Clint Curtis style claims of tampered voting machines, is the legal attempt to stamp out votes and potential voters. Not to say that the illegal attempts are negligible, or that Mr. Curtis is insane (I haven’t any input on that allegation, seriously), but the legal attempts are more likely to sway the vote, and to fall under the radar. For more on the subject of legal, vote theft, refer to the book “The Best Democracy Money Can Buy”, by Mr. Greg Palast.


So stay wary, and know your rights! Particularly if you’re black, brown, and/or poor. If you’ve been convicted of a felony, see the local chapter of ACORN, they have plenty of information on your rights. Their contact information is in the ad section, on the last page.

Everyone should be sure to get in contact with the American Civil Liberties Union (, they are a wealth of information on all of your rights. Enjoy this edition press, folks (!


Written by jackofspades83

February 20, 2008 at 11:16 pm

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: